This is Zombloke 2 here, aka Derrick Wolfgang Peterson the Second aka Ricky "garbage day" Jackson. It appears that an unauthorized transmission was fed into our broadcast wavelengths. Let me assure you that this is pure bullshit. There has been a security breach but that breach occurred in our network system and it is the only reason that message got out.
We seek to assure you that nothing is amiss here. The Red Moon will pass on by harmlessly. It is merely the result of justifiable cosmic phenomenon. It will have no bearing on our businesses nor our lives. It is advised that the public merely treat this event as a spectacular show of the heavens and not overreact.
In the meantime, we will use this lull to further our extensive ZombieWatch programme in order to prepare us for the worst. Which won't happen today. Promise.
Signed,
Zombloke 2
The Real Sleem Shadee
The Real Zombloke 2
Not a super-intelligent alien being scheming to take over the world using cadavers
Tuesday, August 28, 2007
The Red Moon
*Static* This is Derrick here. *awkward staticky pause (now represented by n number of dots)* lying to you..... Zombloke 2 is not me............... there has.... breach......... life in peril...... made contact 2 weeks ago...... previous report filed but.............. obliterated........ censorship..... the Red Moon...... it is their emissary..... clarion call....... will...... be heard. The... MB-1 Complex... is..... under attack...... within.... Must.. purge......OH GOD.......NOOOO.........FUC... YOU MOTHER......... NOO.........................OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
*disemboweling noises*
*disemboweling noises*
Monday, August 27, 2007
A Recommended Accommodation
Good Evening, Zombloke the motherfucking Second here. We here at MB-1 have located a suitable housing unit in the event of a zombie invasion. It is presented below:
This is probably one of the more ideal hideaways in Singapore. Why? Simple.
1) It's a provision shop.
2) It has roughly 2 entrances one in front and one in the back.
3) It has a second story vantage point which can serve as a useful crow's nest.
4) The housing unit on top most likely has a loo and perhaps even a kitchen which can be used to cook food.
The provision unit at the bottom of this establishment caters for both food and water. Furthermore, the bottles of alcohol and other assorted chemical and household appliances on sale can be converted into useful weapons such as molotov cocktails, home-made pipe bombs or even a good ol' scotch on the rocks. Never underestimate the usefulness of your local provision store. It's named as such for a reason and that's to ensure your survival during a zombie invasion.
Secondly, the presence of a housing unit on top of the store ensures that you'll have full access to sanitary facilities and perhaps a kitchenette. Again the gas cylinders could be useful in the event of an escape or an overly dramatized last stand.
The vantage points from the second floor and above also proves useful for spotting potential threats/survivors.
The fact that there are only two entrances means that it will be easy to lock down and secure the premises.
However, that can be a double-edged sword. With only two entrances you stand a strong chance of being surrounded and should a breach ever occur, then you're pretty much as screwed as a prostidude at a Thai strip club. Hence it is advised that you come up with a contingency plan as soon as possible. Having a large RV or a hum vee in the back scores bonus points.
This brings me to the end of this snippet on Possible Hideouts Should A Zombie Invasion Occur In The Near Future Which Is Highly Likely If You Think About It And Consider The Signs Heralding Its Occurance In The Next Decade Or So. Feel free to utilize and manipulate this guide to your advantage because after all, we're here to keep you alive.
To you, From me.
Zombloke II
Radioactive Mutant Llama Committee Chairman
Resident President of the Institute of Mental Health
Global Citizen
This is probably one of the more ideal hideaways in Singapore. Why? Simple.
1) It's a provision shop.
2) It has roughly 2 entrances one in front and one in the back.
3) It has a second story vantage point which can serve as a useful crow's nest.
4) The housing unit on top most likely has a loo and perhaps even a kitchen which can be used to cook food.
The provision unit at the bottom of this establishment caters for both food and water. Furthermore, the bottles of alcohol and other assorted chemical and household appliances on sale can be converted into useful weapons such as molotov cocktails, home-made pipe bombs or even a good ol' scotch on the rocks. Never underestimate the usefulness of your local provision store. It's named as such for a reason and that's to ensure your survival during a zombie invasion.
Secondly, the presence of a housing unit on top of the store ensures that you'll have full access to sanitary facilities and perhaps a kitchenette. Again the gas cylinders could be useful in the event of an escape or an overly dramatized last stand.
The vantage points from the second floor and above also proves useful for spotting potential threats/survivors.
The fact that there are only two entrances means that it will be easy to lock down and secure the premises.
However, that can be a double-edged sword. With only two entrances you stand a strong chance of being surrounded and should a breach ever occur, then you're pretty much as screwed as a prostidude at a Thai strip club. Hence it is advised that you come up with a contingency plan as soon as possible. Having a large RV or a hum vee in the back scores bonus points.
This brings me to the end of this snippet on Possible Hideouts Should A Zombie Invasion Occur In The Near Future Which Is Highly Likely If You Think About It And Consider The Signs Heralding Its Occurance In The Next Decade Or So. Feel free to utilize and manipulate this guide to your advantage because after all, we're here to keep you alive.
To you, From me.
Zombloke II
Radioactive Mutant Llama Committee Chairman
Resident President of the Institute of Mental Health
Global Citizen
Sunday, August 26, 2007
Diary of a PARANOID MAN II
Greetings.
he opened his eyes. oh dear gawd. HE OPENED HIS EYES. HAS HE ENTERED THE EMBRACE OF UNDEATH, READY TO DEVOUR HUMAN FLESH? Reaching for my handgun (yes I always keep one handy!), I was ready to make him eat hot lead.
This is the 2nd entry of Diary of a PARANOID MAN. Today, I was in Starbucks when I noticed something pretty otherworldly, and perhaps signalling at the coming of a zombie invasion (where zombloke II deals with astral signs, I deal with human signs).
What the hell was that? No real human being would be THAT stoned. I decided to wait for a bit.
30 minutes later...
he opened his eyes. oh dear gawd. HE OPENED HIS EYES. HAS HE ENTERED THE EMBRACE OF UNDEATH, READY TO DEVOUR HUMAN FLESH? Reaching for my handgun (yes I always keep one handy!), I was ready to make him eat hot lead.
But then...
Breathing a sigh of relief, I put my handgun away.
The Day has not yet come.
Signed,
Zombloke
Internal Conflict
As a follow up from Zombloke II's post and my post from before, let us imagine a scenario.
Lets say, you have found some companions.
And you are holed up in a fortress comparable to Alcatraz, with large supplies of food, drink, weaponry and well guarded escape routes.
You use your radio to call in some help.
Unfortunately, its gonna take between 2-3 months for the army to come, and you're settled in for the long wait.
What do you not do?
Internal conflict.
Never, ever, ever, EVER come into conflict with your companions. Its simply not worth it, everyone dies at the end.
Hasn't anyone noticed that the salient feature of most zombie movies is internal conflict? And this conflict is most often lethal - In 28 days later, the army wants to keep the female protagonists as breeders (forcibly) and they later die. In dawn of the dead, the security guards keep the rescuees imprisoned to prevent them from stealing shit. At the end, they all die.
Even if the conflict does not precipitate into a deadly situation, for an example, in a scuffle, you accidentally blow open one of the sealed entrances, it would definitely at least precipitate into a situation whereby badblood inteferes with circumstances which require teamwork.
Thus, application of F-R-I-E-N-D-S is necessary.
Food (carbohydrates makes people happier)
Romance (oh my!)
Idiotic behaviour (a big no-no)
Ediotic behaviour (is bad too)
No arguments
Decode all differences
Suck on an ice-cream cone to make yourself not angry
Everyone should be FRIENDS!
signed,
Zombloke
Lets say, you have found some companions.
And you are holed up in a fortress comparable to Alcatraz, with large supplies of food, drink, weaponry and well guarded escape routes.
You use your radio to call in some help.
Unfortunately, its gonna take between 2-3 months for the army to come, and you're settled in for the long wait.
What do you not do?
Internal conflict.
Never, ever, ever, EVER come into conflict with your companions. Its simply not worth it, everyone dies at the end.
Hasn't anyone noticed that the salient feature of most zombie movies is internal conflict? And this conflict is most often lethal - In 28 days later, the army wants to keep the female protagonists as breeders (forcibly) and they later die. In dawn of the dead, the security guards keep the rescuees imprisoned to prevent them from stealing shit. At the end, they all die.
Even if the conflict does not precipitate into a deadly situation, for an example, in a scuffle, you accidentally blow open one of the sealed entrances, it would definitely at least precipitate into a situation whereby badblood inteferes with circumstances which require teamwork.
Thus, application of F-R-I-E-N-D-S is necessary.
Food (carbohydrates makes people happier)
Romance (oh my!)
Idiotic behaviour (a big no-no)
Ediotic behaviour (is bad too)
No arguments
Decode all differences
Suck on an ice-cream cone to make yourself not angry
Everyone should be FRIENDS!
signed,
Zombloke
Thursday, August 23, 2007
Potential Zombie Threats
This is ZomblokeII or Zombloke2.0 or The Zombloke formerly known as Derrick Wolfgang Peterson II. Turns out that we here in subterranean bunker MB-1 require super duper secret passcodes to access the coffee machines and the cafeteria so I'd best start referring to myself in code.
The most pressing issue right here and right now is detection of a potential outbreak. As mentioned by Zombloke, zombies usually appear out of nowhere, with little to no discernible cause. Therefore, it is of paramount importance that we identify 'threat' zones and act quickly either to minimize the threat level or to cordon off the area in question.
As some may have noticed today, a circular rainbow appeared around the sun. This was the direct result of our advanced cosmic satellites utilizing the full extent of the energy spectrum in attempt to designate and identify these 'threat' zones. So far, we have established at least 42123 potential sites that our agents out in the field are working to classify and contain.
For now, it is best that we alert the public on dealing with Zombies. This article aims to address what one should do in terms of finding accommodation should zombies strike.
Firstly, it is important that you get to a position as far away from the zombies as possible. By this I don't mean run to the hills but instead work towards finding higher ground. Apartment buildings and shopping centres are ideal for this. One, they provide a vantage point allowing you to spot potential incoming threats or survivors. Two, they have at least one sealed access way which if you're lucky enough remains sealed and can be used as an escape route. Furthermore, the amount of resources found your average apartment block or shopping centre can be used for many different things. Amongst these, the most crucial are as construction materials to erect barricades, food and water for sustenance, and potential weapons which can be used in self-defence. The presence of a radio or television set is also crucial as it allows one to maintain a link with the outside world, allowing you to receive or transmit signals to other survivor colonies and/or rescue efforts
Once you have found suitable lodgings, it is advised that you immediately access it as you would a Single Party State. A good place to set up base would be anywhere with the following
(in order of importance):
1) A nifty escape route.
2) A cache of materials which can be used to form defensive barriers should zombies get in. Conversely, if one is able to seal off all possible entrances and/or maintain a close watch on all of them, this would be the most ideal situation.
3) A supply of food and drink. This could be a provision store, a supermarket, 5 fridges filled with nachos and gatorade, etc.
4) A weapons store: knives, guns, wooden ladels, hockey sticks, morning stars, etc.
5) A radio. If you don't have one with you, get one and fast. You will need it for communication and information purposes. This is VERY IMPORTANT.
Once you have assessed your situation, start foraging for materials to put a barrier between you and the zombies. Lock your doors, board up the windows, set the booby traps, whatever it is, do this quickly. If you have partners with you it is imperative that you work together. Divide the labour to ensure maximum efficiency. Check your current position for any supplies that can be used to satisfy the above two criterion for a suitable base camp. If you lack any of the above, it is advised that you grab any weapons lying around and look for a safer residence.
(See Traveling guide for more details.)
If by some fortunate stroke of luck you have found an ideal camp, don't get too comfy. Zombies are notorious for sneakily slipping past defences in a mass horde so never let your guard down. Keep a close eye on your entrances and never ever forget your escape plan. It could mean the difference between life and undeath. Also, it would be prudent for you to start planning for a more permanent settlement (those twinky bars won't last forever.) In these situations, one should probably attempt to make contact with other survivors or any rescue efforts being conducted. There is strength in numbers (or a whole lot of meat shields, whatever.) and there is even more strength behind the 50 tonne husk of M1 Abrams Tank so keep a lookout for any of the living as their presence could prove beneficial.
(See Escape, ZombiePolitik, Getting the Big Guns for more details.)
This guide will be updated in the next few hours with more helpful tips as our expert team of zombie survival coordinators work to collate new and fresh information.
Signed,
ZomblokeII
Master of the Elements
Copper, Uranium, Nickel and Thallium
The most pressing issue right here and right now is detection of a potential outbreak. As mentioned by Zombloke, zombies usually appear out of nowhere, with little to no discernible cause. Therefore, it is of paramount importance that we identify 'threat' zones and act quickly either to minimize the threat level or to cordon off the area in question.
As some may have noticed today, a circular rainbow appeared around the sun. This was the direct result of our advanced cosmic satellites utilizing the full extent of the energy spectrum in attempt to designate and identify these 'threat' zones. So far, we have established at least 42123 potential sites that our agents out in the field are working to classify and contain.
For now, it is best that we alert the public on dealing with Zombies. This article aims to address what one should do in terms of finding accommodation should zombies strike.
Firstly, it is important that you get to a position as far away from the zombies as possible. By this I don't mean run to the hills but instead work towards finding higher ground. Apartment buildings and shopping centres are ideal for this. One, they provide a vantage point allowing you to spot potential incoming threats or survivors. Two, they have at least one sealed access way which if you're lucky enough remains sealed and can be used as an escape route. Furthermore, the amount of resources found your average apartment block or shopping centre can be used for many different things. Amongst these, the most crucial are as construction materials to erect barricades, food and water for sustenance, and potential weapons which can be used in self-defence. The presence of a radio or television set is also crucial as it allows one to maintain a link with the outside world, allowing you to receive or transmit signals to other survivor colonies and/or rescue efforts
Once you have found suitable lodgings, it is advised that you immediately access it as you would a Single Party State. A good place to set up base would be anywhere with the following
(in order of importance):
1) A nifty escape route.
2) A cache of materials which can be used to form defensive barriers should zombies get in. Conversely, if one is able to seal off all possible entrances and/or maintain a close watch on all of them, this would be the most ideal situation.
3) A supply of food and drink. This could be a provision store, a supermarket, 5 fridges filled with nachos and gatorade, etc.
4) A weapons store: knives, guns, wooden ladels, hockey sticks, morning stars, etc.
5) A radio. If you don't have one with you, get one and fast. You will need it for communication and information purposes. This is VERY IMPORTANT.
Once you have assessed your situation, start foraging for materials to put a barrier between you and the zombies. Lock your doors, board up the windows, set the booby traps, whatever it is, do this quickly. If you have partners with you it is imperative that you work together. Divide the labour to ensure maximum efficiency. Check your current position for any supplies that can be used to satisfy the above two criterion for a suitable base camp. If you lack any of the above, it is advised that you grab any weapons lying around and look for a safer residence.
(See Traveling guide for more details.)
If by some fortunate stroke of luck you have found an ideal camp, don't get too comfy. Zombies are notorious for sneakily slipping past defences in a mass horde so never let your guard down. Keep a close eye on your entrances and never ever forget your escape plan. It could mean the difference between life and undeath. Also, it would be prudent for you to start planning for a more permanent settlement (those twinky bars won't last forever.) In these situations, one should probably attempt to make contact with other survivors or any rescue efforts being conducted. There is strength in numbers (or a whole lot of meat shields, whatever.) and there is even more strength behind the 50 tonne husk of M1 Abrams Tank so keep a lookout for any of the living as their presence could prove beneficial.
(See Escape, ZombiePolitik, Getting the Big Guns for more details.)
This guide will be updated in the next few hours with more helpful tips as our expert team of zombie survival coordinators work to collate new and fresh information.
Signed,
ZomblokeII
Master of the Elements
Copper, Uranium, Nickel and Thallium
Preferable companions in time of zombie invasions
Ever watch a zombie movie where the protagonist is all alone? 
If you can't find any of the above, any average joe will do. As long as he can run, shoot, dodge, bash, loot, scavenge, salvage, stab, joke, laugh and play intellectual games.
I highly doubt it. (Except the upcoming I am Legend, starring Will Smith, but even he has a dog)
Undoubtedly, your companion(s) will be extremely important during a zombie invasion or a zombie siege. You're gonna need someone to pass the time with, watch your back, and blow off your head if you get bitten.
Preferable companions:
If you can't find any of the above, any average joe will do. As long as he can run, shoot, dodge, bash, loot, scavenge, salvage, stab, joke, laugh and play intellectual games.
Start finding some friends that you can hole up with during the zombie invasion before its too late.
Signed,
Zombloke
Tuesday, August 21, 2007
Definition of 'Zombie'
How do you define the term 'zombie'? A zombie is known as one who...
1) Will never know the true chill of death, but will never know the fiery passion of life again
2) An undead being who hungers for MAN FLESH
3) A sickly, shambling entity that has rotting flesh stripping off his body
4) A being who knows only one word: "AUUHHHHHHHHHHH"
However you define it, you will know a zombie when you see one.
All zombies should be targetted, and destroyed.
Signed,
Zombloke
1) Will never know the true chill of death, but will never know the fiery passion of life again
2) An undead being who hungers for MAN FLESH
3) A sickly, shambling entity that has rotting flesh stripping off his body
4) A being who knows only one word: "AUUHHHHHHHHHHH"
However you define it, you will know a zombie when you see one.
Above is a specimen of a 'fresh' zombie, one who has not yet reached the 3rd or 4th stage of decomposition. Zombies are usually in various forms of decay, especially if the Virus theory is applied. For an example...
All zombies should be targetted, and destroyed.
Signed,
Zombloke
Diary of a PARANOID MAN
Greetings.
In addition to providing information towards protecting yourself and being able to resist a zombie invasion, I will also chronicle daily events that may hint at traces of a zombie invasion. This is done in the hopes that my personal experiences will educate people in the way they should view their surroundings in order to stay vigilant.
Today, as I entered class, I noticed several disturbing features.
In addition to providing information towards protecting yourself and being able to resist a zombie invasion, I will also chronicle daily events that may hint at traces of a zombie invasion. This is done in the hopes that my personal experiences will educate people in the way they should view their surroundings in order to stay vigilant.
Today, as I entered class, I noticed several disturbing features.
I thought to myself - "what in the world is going on? surely these people can't be so tired as to sleep in class?" In my heart (and my mind) I knew that there was surely something wrong.
Upon close perusal of one of the 'sleepers', I realized that this man wasn't too dead after all, he was just tired (look at that damn essay! A stallion would be exhausted).
And so, brushing my brow, I breathed a sigh of relief.
The Day has not yet come.
Signed,
Zombloke
Monday, August 20, 2007
Possible causes of Zombie Attacks
What the farg causes humans to turn into slobbering and brainless ZOMBIES that hunger for brains?
Over the years, studies involving the causes of zombie invasions have formulated a few theories.
The "VIRUS" Theory
George A. Rom. is a staunch believer of this theory. Basically, a virus is loosed upon the world; resulting in all the dead coming to life. As long as you die, you become a zombie. This is rather bleak.
Did you know that...
1) 39892642 people die a second?
What the farg are we gonna do with more and more dead people running around on the streets? Also, the birth rate will go down tremendously because people are less likely to have intercourse with zombies battering on their barricades with their fists. Less and less people will be alive to fight the zombies, and sooner or later, the world will be overtaken.
The "I-bit-you-and-now-you're-screwed" Theory
Basically, this theory states that as long as you do not get bitten, you remain as a human. Thus, the nature of this theory is highly suggestive of the entire zombie invasion stemming from a single "Host" that spreads the entire zombie plague through the biting and infecting of others. While this theory is less bleak as dead bodies do not turn into zombies, its still pretty screwy, especially when someone you know gets bitten and is in the process of being transmogrified into a zombie.
Many sub theories have stemmed from these 2 main theories. Most zombie movies have left the trigger to the event unknown, making it purposefully vague with intent to intrigue.
While both situations precipitate into a take-over of the world (by zombies), it is still possible to fight off a zombie invasion if we stay prepared and vigilant.
On that note, I am signing off.
Huzzah,
Zombloke
Over the years, studies involving the causes of zombie invasions have formulated a few theories.
The "VIRUS" Theory
George A. Rom. is a staunch believer of this theory. Basically, a virus is loosed upon the world; resulting in all the dead coming to life. As long as you die, you become a zombie. This is rather bleak.
Did you know that...1) 39892642 people die a second?
What the farg are we gonna do with more and more dead people running around on the streets? Also, the birth rate will go down tremendously because people are less likely to have intercourse with zombies battering on their barricades with their fists. Less and less people will be alive to fight the zombies, and sooner or later, the world will be overtaken.
The "I-bit-you-and-now-you're-screwed" Theory
Basically, this theory states that as long as you do not get bitten, you remain as a human. Thus, the nature of this theory is highly suggestive of the entire zombie invasion stemming from a single "Host" that spreads the entire zombie plague through the biting and infecting of others. While this theory is less bleak as dead bodies do not turn into zombies, its still pretty screwy, especially when someone you know gets bitten and is in the process of being transmogrified into a zombie.
Many sub theories have stemmed from these 2 main theories. Most zombie movies have left the trigger to the event unknown, making it purposefully vague with intent to intrigue.
While both situations precipitate into a take-over of the world (by zombies), it is still possible to fight off a zombie invasion if we stay prepared and vigilant.
On that note, I am signing off.
Huzzah,
Zombloke
The Zombies Are The Coming
Good day to you my fellow netizens. My name is Derrick Wolfgang Peterson II and I stand here today to bring you chilling news; Zombies. Are. Coming.
Yes, what first began as the childish notions of dead people coming back to life has evolved into something more sinister; more perverse. This menace is ever present and it draws upon us as we speak, as we breathe, even as we toss and turn in our beds. Yes my brothers and sisters the writing is clearly on the wall, the grapevine is loaded with nothing more than the news of our impending Armageddon. The dead will walk the Earth. The dead will rise from their fitful slumber.
We have been warned countless times but will we take heed of these messages in our final hours of tranquility?
In recent years, the human population has been skyrocketing. With more people, unfortunately, come more deaths. In fact with the amount of dead piling up at the very doorstep of Hell right now, the very words uttered by that black guy in Dawn of the Dead 2 becomes so much more poignant to us now. When there's no more room in Hell, the Dead shall walk the Earth. By no means are we to take this warning lightly for that choice leads us towards the swift highway to our demise or god forbid, our unholy ressurection.
As such, we must begin mounting our defences. There is much to be accomplished and we must not tarry if we are to weather this flood of rotting guts bile and grime. The living shall prevail over whatever Hell spews forth from its diseased loins. Already governments are implementing safety precautions in the homes of the average citizen. Machetes, Pickaxes, Toothpicks, Blow torches, Monkey Wrenches, Blow-up dolls are all part-and-parcel of the average home and in the event of a zombie invasion, they could mean the difference between life and dying as a virgin.
In order to contribute to the war effort against the denizens of your local cemetary. The Council of Undead Fighting Uber Warriors of Holy Baby Infant Jebus (TCUFUWHBIJ) has created this manual found conveniently on this Online Journal Website to educate the layman on things to do should the zombies come. Here you will find detailed escape plans, combat strategies, tips, tricks, leet uber haxes should we be faced with a zombie invasion in the next decade.
Peace to you my brethren.
May AAS protect us all.
Derrick Wolfgang Peterson II
B.Hons Necrology
B.Hons Archeology
B.Hons Banging your Mom
Yes, what first began as the childish notions of dead people coming back to life has evolved into something more sinister; more perverse. This menace is ever present and it draws upon us as we speak, as we breathe, even as we toss and turn in our beds. Yes my brothers and sisters the writing is clearly on the wall, the grapevine is loaded with nothing more than the news of our impending Armageddon. The dead will walk the Earth. The dead will rise from their fitful slumber.
We have been warned countless times but will we take heed of these messages in our final hours of tranquility?
In recent years, the human population has been skyrocketing. With more people, unfortunately, come more deaths. In fact with the amount of dead piling up at the very doorstep of Hell right now, the very words uttered by that black guy in Dawn of the Dead 2 becomes so much more poignant to us now. When there's no more room in Hell, the Dead shall walk the Earth. By no means are we to take this warning lightly for that choice leads us towards the swift highway to our demise or god forbid, our unholy ressurection.
As such, we must begin mounting our defences. There is much to be accomplished and we must not tarry if we are to weather this flood of rotting guts bile and grime. The living shall prevail over whatever Hell spews forth from its diseased loins. Already governments are implementing safety precautions in the homes of the average citizen. Machetes, Pickaxes, Toothpicks, Blow torches, Monkey Wrenches, Blow-up dolls are all part-and-parcel of the average home and in the event of a zombie invasion, they could mean the difference between life and dying as a virgin.
In order to contribute to the war effort against the denizens of your local cemetary. The Council of Undead Fighting Uber Warriors of Holy Baby Infant Jebus (TCUFUWHBIJ) has created this manual found conveniently on this Online Journal Website to educate the layman on things to do should the zombies come. Here you will find detailed escape plans, combat strategies, tips, tricks, leet uber haxes should we be faced with a zombie invasion in the next decade.
Peace to you my brethren.
May AAS protect us all.
Derrick Wolfgang Peterson II
B.Hons Necrology
B.Hons Archeology
B.Hons Banging your Mom
Huzzah,
Zombloke II
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